Sunday, October 23, 2011

Let's dance!!!

Well, I feel like I am at some sort of cross roads in my life! No, really, I am so torn on how I should feel, and what I should say and do as a Mother, that there is real conflict both in my outward behavior, and everything I am feeling on the inside!
It's official! My daughter, has come home with a ring on her finger! Yep, that's right she is engaged to be married! Such an exciting time of life! Both for daughter, and Mother! I am still trying, in my mind, to figure out why it is an exciting time for the Mother, but oddly enough, it truly does seem to be.
It was announced to us at 3 am Saturday morning, that the question had indeed been "popped"
I wish sometimes I could see back in time, into my own Mothers mind, and see exactly what it was that she was thinking when I told her I would be getting married!
I am sure that I was totally NOT ready to get married, yet???, here we are, 23 years later...looking back, on both good, bad, exceptionally good and exceptionally bad times throughout the years, I can see the reason for concern, that my parents might have had.
Yet, at the same time, I can see how much I have grown into myself, at being given the opportunity, to go out into the world and find out who I truly was, and find a way to grow into the person that I am today! Am I the same person that I started out as??? Thank goodness NO! Have I learned a LOT??? Oh, HELL YES!!! Is that the way that it is suppose to be?? I think so. NO one can learn anything, without being give the chance and opportunity to do so!
I am at an all new place for me! An all new learning curve is about to be implemented, and I am so hoping all the hard work I have put in over the last years, have served to teach me the ability to dance, with grace, and learn the dance moves quickly!
I will NEVER be a ballerina, but I sure hope that I will have fun learning the "steps" to the dance!! Loves to all!

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